The BAFTA awards ceremony was terrific. Conducted with a minimum of fuss, ceremony and ridiculous frocks, and a maximum of Fryesque facial hair, it even featured Daniel Day-Lewis taking the piss out of his Method-acting ways. “Just in case of this moment,” he said, “I’ve stayed in character as myself for 55 years; had a selection of BAFTA sets downscaled and placed in my living room…”
And so, without further ado, my awards for the best BAFTA ceremony moments go to:
Most unctuous introduction: “Sumptuous and superlatively scrumptious… one of the true immortals of Hollywood” – Stephen Fry on Sally Field.
Least unctuous: “A death mask on a stick” – Billy Connolly on the BAFTA trophy.
Most bizarre introduction: Stephen Fry is famous for these. I liked “Please ululate wildly for…” and “Please spank palms audibly for…”. But the winner is for Life of Pi, which Fry supposedly mistook for an American Pie sequel: “Sadly it featured no young men pleasuring themselves with fruit-filled fancies.”
Biggest upset: Christoph Waltz beat not just Philip Seymour Hoffman (The Master) but more strangely Javier Bardem in Skyfall. But the biggest upset must still be Argo taking Best Film. Even Samuel L Jackson, presenting the award, read it out with a chuckle of obvious amazement.
Smallest upset: A three-way tie between Amour winning Best Foreign Language Film; Daniel Day-Lewis getting Best Actor; and Anne Hathaway winning Best Supporting Actress.
Most sincere acceptance speech: “This is a second act for me… I’m so grateful and proud” – Ben Affleck getting Best Director.
Least sincere: Quentin Tarantino (Best Original Screenplay, again) sounded about as chuffed as if he’d been offered a cigarette. And he doesn’t smoke.
For the full list of winners, go to http://awards.bafta.org/